Ted 2012

Mary F. Pols, TIME Magazine: MacFarlane has definitely made the best leap from animated television to movies since 1999′s South Park: Bigger Longer & Uncut. Read more

Glenn Kenny, MSN Movies: ...it does serve up a pretty jaw-dropping array of remarkably crude, nasty, and at times pretty gut-busting jokes. Read more

A.O. Scott, New York Times: The sin of "Ted" is not that it is offensive but that it is boring, lazy and wildly unoriginal. If Triumph the Insult Comic Dog ever got a hold of Ted, there would be nothing left but a pile of fluff and a few scraps of fur. Read more

Rex Reed, New York Observer: Will it make you wince with embarrassment? That's a promise. Will you also laugh? In double-time, like a Rockette. Read more

Joe Morgenstern, Wall Street Journal: Everything goes on too long -- Ted's carousing, Lori's watchful waiting, John's wistful indecision. Read more

Soren Anderson, Seattle Times: Some of this is undeniably funny, but the humor is very hit-or-miss. Read more

Nathan Rabin, AV Club: An incongruously cute interspecies buddy comedy that's powered alternately by the pixie dust of boyhood imagination and the ruder, cruder urges of adolescence. Read more

Bill Goodykoontz, Arizona Republic: The one-note joke plays out longer and better than you might expect, at least for a while. But not forever. Read more

Ty Burr, Boston Globe: A crass, foul-mouthed, mostly hilarious, surprisingly sentimental bromance about a grown boy named John and his teddy bear. Read more

Michael Phillips, Chicago Tribune: Like "Family Guy," "Ted" is only about its own hyperlinked pop culture references. Read more

Chris Vognar, Dallas Morning News: You can overlook an awful lot in a comedy when it makes you laugh. Read more

Lisa Kennedy, Denver Post: It's a goofy premise pursued with crass -- as well as sentimental -- relish. Read more

Tom Long, Detroit News: "Ted" is so lazy you want to kick the stuffing out of it. Read more

Lisa Schwarzbaum, Entertainment Weekly: Even though a lot of the movie is grating dumb-assery, it's something to behold. Stuffed with crap, but something. Read more

Laremy Legel, Film.com: You'll feel the warmth and camaraderie of a Bostonian and his little sentient bear. Read more

Todd McCarthy, Hollywood Reporter: Not too many films serve up laughs that just keep on rolling with regularity from beginning to end, but Seth MacFarlane's directorial debut does so and without any feeling of strain. Read more

Christy Lemire, Associated Press: Much of the material works because the bear has someone to bounce off of; Wahlberg does his best work in situations like this, where he's playing it totally straight in a setting that's totally silly. Read more

Betsy Sharkey, Los Angeles Times: To fully appreciate "Ted," it's best to simply forgive its bad behavior upfront and save any apologies for liking it until later. Sorry. Read more

Rene Rodriguez, Miami Herald: This is exactly the same plot as The Muppets, in which Jason Segel was forced to choose between Amy Adams and Kermit the Frog. Read more

Rafer Guzman, Newsday: Underneath the matted fur of the movie's foul-mouthed bear beats a very real heart. Read more

Richard Brody, New Yorker: The movie's stuffing of creative smarts is still inert. Read more

Stephen Whitty, Newark Star-Ledger: The idea of a toy that comes to life - and then won't go away - isn't a bad one. Too bad that "Ted" manages to overstay its welcome without ever really coming to life itself. Read more

Bob Mondello, NPR: I tried to resist but couldn't. Read more

Elizabeth Weitzman, New York Daily News: Not every joke scores, of course. But the hits are worth the misses, and anyway, the movie's true genius is in the way its outlandish scenario is played so perfectly straight. Read more

Kyle Smith, New York Post: I expected "Ted" to be a one-joke movie, but it's got ideas spilling out of its seams. Read more

Steven Rea, Philadelphia Inquirer: I'm betting on Mark Wahlberg for best actor when the Oscars swing around next year. Read more

James Berardinelli, ReelViews: Ted is essentially a one-joke movie. Okay, it's a very funny joke, but it's still only one joke. Read more

Roger Ebert, Chicago Sun-Times: The plot of "Ted" is fairly standard but greatly embellished by MacFarlane's ability to establish comic situations and keep them building. Read more

Peter Travers, Rolling Stone: Seth MacFarlane's debut as a feature director hits all the sweet spots that irritate prudes. Ted is hysterically, gut-bustingly funny. Read more

Andrew O'Hehir, Salon.com: In a universe of Hollywood comedies that seem determined to insult the audience and pander to the basest form of post-adolescent fantasy, "Ted" feels almost sophisticated. Read more

Amy Biancolli, San Francisco Chronicle: For all of its transgressive plush-toy sex and screw-'em humor, the plot is pretty standard stuff. Read more

David Haglund, Slate: It is funny to watch a teddy bear wail on Mark Wahlberg. But afterward, I mostly felt beat up. Read more

Colin Covert, Minneapolis Star Tribune: Welcome to the funniest comedy of 2012. Read more

Joe Holleman, St. Louis Post-Dispatch: The plot is simply a shaky frame on which to hang drug and sex jokes and numerous pop-culture references. Read more

Globe and Mail: As unabashedly idiotic movie comedies go, Ted goes fairly well. Read more

Alonso Duralde, TheWrap: The stuff that sticks to the wall is so outrageously hilarious that it's ultimately worth enduring the film's lackadaisical pacing and lazy misogyny. Read more

Ben Walters, Time Out: Sure, MacFarlane, you can make us laugh, but it's time to grow up. Seriously. Read more

David Fear, Time Out: Ted ends up undermining both halves of its whole, as well as its creator's clear intent to add something a little deeper to his crassness. Read more

Peter Howell, Toronto Star: Ted's real trick is turning a one-joke premise into a reasonable facsimile of a movie, and one that isn't entirely bent on grossing us out. Read more

Claudia Puig, USA Today: The natural interactions between Ted and his beloved man-child owner, John, terrifically played as an adult by Mark Wahlberg, are more often than not ridiculously funny. Read more

Peter Debruge, Variety: [A] predictably irreverent satire that's sweeter and, sadly, less funny than you might expect. Read more

Melissa Anderson, Village Voice: Anyone over 15 ... might sit in the theater in stony silence. Read more

Ann Hornaday, Washington Post: What began as a promising, if unhinged, experiment in suspending disbelief starts to feel like "You, Me and Dupree" for plushies. Read more