G.I. Joe: Retaliation 2013

Critics score:
28 / 100

Reviews provided by RottenTomatoes

Richard Corliss, TIME Magazine: Retaliation is less a sequel than an antidote to the calcified mound of crap that ostensibly inspired it. Read more

Glenn Kenny, MSN Movies: When it comes to big and loud, this is the movie to beat for at least this week; what makes it entertaining is its unabashed wallow in these qualities ... Read more

Neil Genzlinger, New York Times: There should be a "Fans Only" sign at the door of every theater. Read more

Joe Morgenstern, Wall Street Journal: I won't pretend that I had a great time watching "G.I. Joe: Retaliation." Read more

Scott Bowles, USA Today: A more sure-footed shoot-'em-up that finds some heart, wit and perhaps enough momentum to spawn a formidable action franchise. Read more

Soren Anderson, Seattle Times: As for plot and character development, well, um ... did I mention the picture has a lot of guns? Read more

Justin Chang, Variety: Retaliation makes any number of ham-fisted bids for topical relevance, and naturally almost every one of them represents an affront to good taste. Read more

Scott Tobias, AV Club: A lumbering beast, bogged down by too many characters and an incomprehensible plot. Read more

Bill Goodykoontz, Arizona Republic: Ever played a video game with a friend and had to sit there while he hogged it, leaving you to do nothing but watch for what seemed like hours? Read more

Tom Russo, Boston Globe: Good luck recalling any other would-be set pieces a couple of days after you've seen Retaliation. Read more

Michael Phillips, Chicago Tribune: The directive behind this sequel, clearly, was non-stop action. Let's think about that phrase a second. Do we really want our action movies to deliver action that does not stop? Ever? I get a little tired of action sequences that won't stop. Read more

Tom Long, Detroit News: No go, "Joe." Read more

Owen Gleiberman, Entertainment Weekly: It's well-executed technocratic action fluff. But it did leave me buzzed rather than drained. Read more

Wesley Morris, Grantland: Did you think a second G.I. Joe movie was a good idea? Read more

Todd McCarthy, Hollywood Reporter: Good if you're a 12-15-year-old boy, bad if you're just about anyone else. Read more

Betsy Sharkey, Los Angeles Times: To borrow from Jack in the Box, "G. I. Joe: Retaliation" is one hot mess. Read more

Christy Lemire, Associated Press: That's not to say that this G.I. Joe is good, aside from a couple of dazzling action set pieces, but at least it's efficient in its muscular mindlessness. Read more

Rafer Guzman, Newsday: The junky pleasures of the first installment now just seem like junk in this noisy, nonsensical, lead-footed sequel. Read more

Stephen Whitty, Newark Star-Ledger: Unmitigated nonsense to anyone but diehard fans. Read more

Mark Jenkins, NPR: What's the difference between an action figure and an action star? Very little in G.I. Joe: Retaliation, which features no performances of note, even from such combat-tested thespians as Bruce Willis, Jonathan Pryce and Dwayne Johnson. Read more

Joe Neumaier, New York Daily News: The G.I. Joe team is back, and most of their sophomore movie adventure, G.I. Joe Retaliation, is as bland as their name and as subtle as an exploding tank. Read more

Kyle Smith, New York Post: "G.I. Joe: Retaliation" has enough hoo-ah to bring a satisfying blast of blockbustery summer to dreary March. Read more

Michael Sragow, Orange County Register: Movies like GI Joe: Retaliation want to give you the video-game equivalent of an itchy trigger-finger. It's an emotion-free zone. Read more

James Berardinelli, ReelViews: Everything in G.I. Joe: Retaliation is perfunctory - technically proficient but soulless. It's not exciting. It's boring. Read more

Richard Roeper, Chicago Sun-Times: Like a Dumpster bin behind Tiffany's, this contains nothing but well-packaged garbage. Read more

Peter Hartlaub, San Francisco Chronicle: The filmmakers appear to have handed a dozen or so G.I. Joe dolls to a 9-year-old, watched him play for 110 minutes, and then shot a scene-for-scene remake. Read more

Joe Williams, St. Louis Post-Dispatch: Good Lord, what did we do to deserve "G.I. Joe: Retaliation"? Read more

Liam Lacey, Globe and Mail: What a blast G.I. Joe: Retaliation is! And then another blast, and another, in a series of concussive jolts that shred any conventional sense of story as thoroughly as anything since the last Michael Bay film. Read more

Peter Howell, Toronto Star: It's like a giant explosion on a distant planet, observed but not felt. Read more

Tom Huddleston, Time Out: It looks as though some bright spark at Joe HQ decided that what the series needed was to lose its fun, post-'Team America' self-awareness and replace it with unironic jingoism, military-fetish hardware and heavy-handed nods to real world events. Read more

Keith Uhlich, Time Out: Plays like a tiresomely extended evening of channel surfing. Read more

Alan Scherstuhl, Village Voice: It's not enough to call this the rare franchise action movie to bring the goods; it's the even rarer one whose creators seem to understand what the goods even are. Read more

Bilge Ebiri, New York Magazine/Vulture: It's not stoopid anymore, but just plain stupid. Read more

Stephanie Merry, Washington Post: People may flock to G.I. Joe: Retaliation despite its inert illogic. But don't say you weren't warned. As a wise man once said, "knowing is half the battle." Read more

Alonso Duralde, TheWrap: Once the story picks up, it's all ka-blam all the time, but rather than generate thrills and excitement, it ultimately becomes enervating. Read more